The best response so far to our claim that pickleball is the best sport for stoners
Forget about our extensive coverage of the Massachusetts Cannabis Control Commission or the product reviews that we do. Since we launched this site, our most viral article by far has been about how pickleball is an ace sport for stoners.
With thousands of people still reading and sharing the humor piece weekly, we’ve naturally received feedback as well—mostly urging us to start some kind of club for those who smoke and play (hang tight, it’s coming). And as you might imagine, there has also been some pushback from devotees of other sports.
While we’ve seen convincing cases laid out for golf, spikeball, ultimate, and some other pastimes and plan on incorporating them in future sports coverage, this letter from a bocce diehard had us cracking up enough that we thought it warranted posting all on its own. They gave us permission to reprint as long as we simply call them “Ally” because they “just want to be left alone so [they] can smoke and play bocce all day.” Which we completely understand.
Without further ado …
Dear Chris Faraone,
Please give the following message to Talking Joints Memo readers: Sorry pickle ballers, but it’s bocce that’s the best for burners.
I can’t believe I even have to write this. Don’t you know it’s played on grass or dirt—two words for marijuana. Shall I continue?
Many people also say the word “bocce” itself comes from the Italian word “bacio,” which means “to kiss.” Not everyone agrees with that, but we’re too drunk and stoned to argue about it.
My biggest reason however that bocce is more for stoners than your paddle fun is that while pickleball may indeed be named for a food, bocce is one of the few sports that you can actually play while you’re eating. Fold your slice, grab your burger, and have at it. There’s not even a chance of choking.
I’m not writing this on behalf of anyone, but anyone who doesn’t believe me about this should check out Major League Bocce in Boston or any city. It’s “Major League,” sure, but more like the movie with Charlie Sheen than anything else. You’ve never seen a more laid back bunch. We’re not necessarily all stoners, but everyone I play with has been fine with my occasional poor performance on account of eating too many edibles beforehand.
Anyway, I wasn’t even going to send this letter, since us bocce players are all about love. But a lot of us are all about weed too, and I thought that you should know.
Sincerely,
Ally